Should I introduce my teenager to alcohol?

It's a question that most parents face.

Put it another way: is it better to have a blanket 'no' or should one try and introduce a child to 'civilised' drinking? It is a question that each family must work out for themselves.

Be clear also that the law puts the responsibility fairly and squarely on the shoulders of parents - it is illegal to sell alcohol to underage children and young people, but it is not illegal for parents to supply it to their children.

If a family leaves it to the child to discover alcohol without guidance, do they run the risk that the child will learn bad habits from learning to drink in the context of teen parties and similar activities? If the parents do introduce the child to drinking alcohol moderately within the family, do they run the risk of the child developing a dependency from an early age? Or is it another example of how we are depriving children of their childhood by introducing them to adult activities too early?

Here are some factors which parents should take into consideration when making this decision -

  • Am I a good role model? If you want your child to learn how to drink responsibly, moderately and in a civilised manner then make sure that is how they see you drink alcohol at all times. Is a glass of wine or beer with quiet conversation a normal everyday part of your family life? Or are dinner parties at your place actually riotous affairs?
  • Family values. Any decision you make must reflect the family values that you teach and practice in the family. For example, for the family that believes in total abstinence from alcohol, it is easy to decide whether or not to introduce a child to alcoholic drinks. The Muslim family will act on one set of values, the Catholic or Baptist family on another, while the secular non-religious family will act on yet another set of beliefs and values.
  • The child's maturity. Don't make the decision on a simple age basis -"You can have a drink of beer when you turn 12 years of age." Consider the maturity of the child and their ability to understand concepts such as moderation and restraint, peer pressure and their ability to act on them.
  • Know the risk factors. Consider the wider context of your family. Do you live in a hard drinking neighbourhood? Is your child subject to a lot of peer pressure? Do many of his or her mates lack good parental guidance? Does your family have a history of alcoholism?


Further links:


Useful helplines

For an emergency ring 111 Alcohol Drug helpline 0800 787 797 for confidential information, advice and referral services if you have concerns about your own, or someone else's, drinking or drug use. The line, co-ordinated by the Alcohol Drug Association New Zealand, is open between 10am and 10pm, seven days a week.

  • Alcoholics Anonymous. Ring 0800 229675
  • Al-Anon. Ring 0508 425 2666
  • Alateen. Ring 0508 425 2666
  • Youthline. Ring 0800 376 633